Why should pet shows just be for dogs and cats? Well, now it's the gerbils' turn! Today the American Gerbil society held it's annual pageant in Bedford, MA to pick America's next Top Gerbil! Apparently these cute little furry animals are judged by their agility in terms of how they can overcome obstacles (when they're put through a course they have to get through by rolling around in gerbil balls). I think it's kind of inspiring the way they're picked based on how they overcome obstacles. It makes me kind of wish other pageants for people were like that. I think I'd watch Miss America pageants religiously if I knew that the contestants had to find a way to show how they could overcome obstacles. Granted seeing a poor girl running an obstacle course in an evening dress seems rather cruel. Perhaps they could show how they could resolve a fight between friends or something, it would really show their commitment to world peace!
Anyway, the idea of this pageant for gerbils got me thinking about what, if gerbils could talk, would a gerbil say upon winning the Top Gerbil prize. In my head the acceptance speech would go something like this:
" Oh my God! I'm so excited I could spin around in seven wheels consecutively and not feel a bit worn out! (That's how impressive I am!) In fact, first off, I'd like to thank whoever invented gerbil wheels! They've really helped me stay fit and trim to win this competition! I'd also like to thank the people who invented vegetable pellets because they're yummy and of course I'd like to thank my owner for buying me the yummy pellets and the wheels! (Although I suspect she does it because I've got her wrapped around my little paw.) To end, I'd just like to say: long live gerbils because we rock and roll!"
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